Congregations who regularly have fun with one another are healthier congregations emotionally. Laughing together has great benefits for worshiping and ministering together. Just as laughter is good for the health of individuals, laughter is great for the health of congregations. It can even be said that congregations who laugh together stay together. While it is actually not that simple, it is at least a huge step in the right direction.
An early sign that congregations are about to get in trouble is when they can no longer laugh with, and even at, one another. Or, if humor has an edge to it, rather than being innocent fun and is used to cover up true feelings, this may be an early sign of escalating conflict. People may use humor with an edge as a test to see if they can make sharper comments and get away with it.
Laugher is also an early sign that congregations are beginning to heal and reconcile with one another when they can start laughing with, and even at, one another again without people taking offense. When laughter once again becomes pure fun and enjoyable then congregations may be well be on the road to healthy conflict once again.
Congregations who are healthy and maturing emotionally are less likely to engage in conflict that reaches an unhealthy intensity. Fun and fellowship are not a guarantee that unhealthy conflict can be avoided, but they do enhance positive relationships within the congregation and can hinder the development of unhealthy conflict. They can also enhance the depth of appreciation congregational participants have for one another.
Regularly means having some type of significant community building experiences at least eight times per year that can involve the whole congregation. In congregations that have multiple worship services one experience could be quarterly joint worship services that blend the styles of worship, have people from all worship services participating in worship leadership, and focus on celebrating the life and spiritual accomplishments of congregational participants. Another could be to sponsor fellowships, picnics, church anniversaries or homecomings, pastor and staff anniversaries, and other such events where staff and lay leaders are seen in different roles than is typical and that focus around having fun.
Missions and ministries trips, spiritual retreats, marriage retreats, and other similar gatherings that are all of a serious nature can also have intentional fun associated with them. Interaction, fellowship, and koinonia are critical characteristics of healthy congregations. Yes, the praise and adoration of the triune God is the core focus of congregations, but also enjoying one another in the loving spirit of the Lord is part of being congregation. Happiness with one another contributes to spiritual health. And it provides a great defense against unhealthy conflict. Congregations who have fun can also be a tremendous witness to their context as their reputation for enjoying one another is something that may be known throughout their context. Certainly when congregation dislike one another this is something that becomes known in their context.
What is going on with the fun factor in your congregation? What is your laughter indicating about the health or unhealth of conflict in your congregation?
Copyright 2009, Rev. George Bullard, D.Min
